Hello and happy summer! I hoped to get this post done before the school year ended, but, you know, life happened. I finally finished the series and wanted to follow up with my thoughts on the Netflix Original Series 13 Reasons Why. Hmmmm...where to begin...?
I guess I should start with the obvious: this show is a fictional series. Like most of what we view on television or online, its contents should be taken with a grain of salt. I realize that much of it probably reflects part of the high school experience, but a lot of it doesn't. How would I know, you ask? Because I spoke with many of your peers on what they are experiencing in high school. The resounding themes that emerged were this: 1) The show is extreme. 2) High school is not exactly like that. 3) Teachers are more in tune with what's going on with students. 4) Students know to reach out to an adult if they are concerned for a friend. I was encouraged by the candid conversations I had with our students, and felt some sense of relief. However, I'm not naive. The topics of suicide and self-harm are very real and very relevant to our community of teenagers. We can't turn a blind eye and pretend it's not happening, but we also can't glamorize these acts. In my opinion, the show leaned a little too far toward making suicide seem like a viable option. Just to be clear: it should never be your option. I do appreciate that the topic of suicide was put in the spotlight, due to Hollywood's version. It seems suicide is more often taboo and a topic to be feared, but we need to be talking about it more often. We also need to talk about what's behind it: why are so many teens feeling like taking their own life is the only door to walk through? Why are so many students turning to self-harm (non-suicidal acts)? There are an endless supply of reasons, and I won't attempt to list them all here, because it's a little different for each person. The bottom line, though, is this: You are not alone. I recently saw a post on Instagram by @humansofny, where the girl pictured talked about what she experienced in middle school. Granted, I know 8th grade is different than high school, but I believe this quote is relevant: "I don't think I'm going to miss eighth grade. It's been a tough year. A lot of my friends are struggling with depression and self-harm, and it's hard for me to watch. I just care about them so much. Growing up is so hard for some people. It's such a big thing. It's your foundation, I guess. You're becoming you. It's such a big thing and we're going through it right now. Some of my friends are struggling with loving themselves and loving life. I think they forget that we're still learning. They think that they're already who they're going to be. They think they know the future. And it's going to be horrible. And they'll never be able to fix it. But that's not true because we're still changing. And we'll always be changing. Even when we're old, we'll be changing." This really spoke to me. It spoke to the me now, and I wish I could have read it when I was in the 8th grade. Maybe you can identify with it, too... I guess, what I want you to get out of this post is this: talk to someone you trust. A parent, a sibling, a teacher, a counselor, a pastor, a friend. All you need is one person to connect with and lend a compassionate ear. No one out there is alone in this life. Human connection is so important and vital to get through. We were meant to be there for one another and support each other's burdens. That's the main reason I decided to become a counselor: for students to have a safe, confidential person who is in their corner. *Side note: I will say I wasn't impressed by the depiction of a school counselor on the show. If you've never met your school counselor, I would encourage you to get to know the "real life" version and disregard Hollywood's version. We aren't all like that. Just putting it out there... So, to wrap up this longer than planned post, I want you to remember:
I hope this post finds you happy, healthy, and enjoying your summer. I look forward to seeing you all in August...please stop in to say hi! If you need someone to talk to, remember that's why I'm here. See my previous post on this topic for a helpful info graphic on suicide, self-harm, and the show. Stay safe and seek help. National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (available 24/7) 1-800-273-8255 https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
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